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Friday, December 14, 2012

If you give it, you have to be willing to take it.

I like to improve myself, wherever I can. 
So, with that being the case, I am going to list my faults, of which I am aware, and then I want you to be blunt and tell me any others you see that you would like to point out. If you don't want to go on the record, send them to me in private. I won't hold it against you and I will probably thank you.
I may or may not agree with you, but I will certainly consider and listen to whatever it is you have to say. I am asking for it, so lay it on me. I am a big boy and I can take it.

1. I am extremely blunt. That is mostly a good thing. Most of the time. Except when you go over the line. I do that sometimes. Maybe more than sometimes. Most love me for it. Some don't. Most love that I do it, but sometimes wish that I wouldn't. What is your take on this?

2. I can be insensitive. No positive way to spin this. It is a fault of mine. I admit that. I am also a great friend willing to help most anybody, anytime, for free. I never expect anything in return for that. So, you take your good with your bad. But being insensitive is never good, no matter how you spin it.

3. I am mega stubborn and like to think I am right almost all the time. This one gets me in more trouble and more arguments than any other. This is purely a DNA thing. My father was this way and I am definitely my fathers son. I am better than I was 30 years ago, and each year I get a bit better, so I am improving there. But I still have a long way to go. A long way. And I will never be much different, just modified. I have a stubborn defiant nature. It is what it is. The best I can hope for is to be aware and work with it.

4. I like to mock. But at times I don't pick my spots well enough. Almost to the point of regret. Again, this is something I have improved greatly over the years, but still a long way to go.

5. Related to 1,2,3 and 4, I am very opinionated. I like to think it is a good thing that I have the guts and don't sit on the fence, and that I take a position on things. But, there is a time and place. Sometimes,  my big mouth puts me in the wrong time and wrong place.

6.  I wouldn't say I objectify women, because I don't, but I am very vocal about what I like. That comes off badly at times. Those that really know me know that I am not that bad, but it can sound that way to those that don't. I need to be more careful and aware of that. 

7.  I like to win. And debate, and at times I don't know when to let up. That has served me well in many things in life, but it can wear on people. I am fully aware of it,  as I see it in others. I would like to correct this part of my nature, but it is again kind of built in. So, I work with it. I am certainly aware of it though. 

8. I am extremely critical and I don't hold back. Sometimes that gets in the way of my actual point. I am aware of that. If the point is to get your point across, detracting from that is a flaw. I get that. But being aware of it and stopping from doing it are two entirely different animals.

9. I have a biting, cutting sense of humor. But humor is supposed to be, first and foremost, funny. So, I have to work on that.

10. I like who I am. I don't really care if people do or don't. That is mostly a pretty good thing. But, I should care just a bit more. That is in my own interests to do so. If there is such a thing as being too confident, I might fall into that category. It is an odd thing to say, but in my case it is very valid.



  1. This is a very honest and introspective blog. I have a thick skin, so I don't have any problems with you, although I know some do. I appreciate your bluntness. Like you, I tend to be blunt. I'm not insensitive, but because I am nearly impossible to offend, I sometimes forget that other people are not that tough, and I say more than I should. I try to care what other people think - not because I shouldn't be myself, but because it isn't my intention to hurt people.

  2. I find myself wondering how you can like who you are, and yet have a pretty long list of things you feel you need to improve, work on, or do better with. That doesn't completely make sense to me because I always imagine that people who are truly comfortable in their own skin don't feel like they need to modify so many things.


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