I will remember you, will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
Sarah McLachlan is a famous and talented singer. That is how she will likely be remembered when she is no longer around. Some might also remember her for starting Lilith Fair, and how that empowered some female artists in the ways it did.
I
just love her music, and I will always remember her for one specific
song, which haunted me the first time I heard it, and still does. I
remember I was working at a dispatcher gig at the time, which was how I
made money back in the day, and You Tube had just started to exist. It
was a slow night and things were going well. Dispatchers have a hectic
job, but when things go well it can be boring because you have so much
time on your hands. This was one of those nights when nobody screwed up
or asked me to make something happen that seemed impossible to make
happen.
So,
I just listened and played this song, over and over again, because it haunted me with the melody, the sentiment and the lyrics. The video
is also unique, and generally I'm not one who even looks at the video
when I listen to the songs. Anyway, here it is, and its the thing that I
think of first whenever I think of Sarah
McLachlan
, and its what I always will think of first.
Cause I can't be the one
you wanted me to be
.......
A made up story, to fit a picture perfect world
Yesterday came word that two people died. I admit I'd never heard of either of them. So, whatever was said in the headline is likely what I now know and remember. Here is what I now know about Mark Salling and Jay Switzer.
Mark
Salling was 35, an actor on Glee, and he liked child porn, to the point
he had a bad addiction and the police had to raid his house. He then was
convicted and was about to do jail time, but he committed suicide for
whatever reason that we might never find out or understand. Ten years
from now, if someone mentions his name, what I will remember is he was
on Glee and he liked child porn. That is what defines his life to the
masses. I'm sure there was lots more to him, as there is for everyone.
Jay
Switzer was 61 and died of brain cancer. While many wont remember that
part, I will. My mother was young like Jay Switzer, in that she was 66.
She also got brain cancer and while she lasted longer and lingered for a
while, it took both her and Switzer fairly quickly, as brain cancer is
prone to do. Seemingly, Jay Switzer never did anything bad in his life,
not bad enough to make his obit, although we all do bad things at some
point in our lives. So, what I know about him is that he was 61, a media
icon who helped turn City TV into the conglomerate it now is by
expanding the CHUM brand. He was well loved and liked and a good family
man. That is what I know, and how he will be remembered.
As
I said in a roundabout way, I wont really remember Mark Salling much. I
don't watch Glee, never have and never will. He had no effect on my
life and while it is sad he died young and had the issues he did, there
are lots of pedophiles out there, and he is just one among many. He was
not significant to me.
Jay
Switzer did have some effect on my life, even though I didn't know his
name until yesterday. But because he died of brain cancer, and young at
that, whenever I see him referred to, I will think of my mother. Others
who don't have that connection wont. He will be the guy that ran the
City TV empire and never did anything wrong enough to speak about on the
day of his death.
When
I write blogs like these, I start out with a premise, but while I am in
the middle of writing them, memories pop up I didn't expect to pop up
and change the direction of the blog. It happens to me as fast as you
can read the words I write.
As
I was writing this one, Tiger Woods name came to my mind. Why? Well, he is
the textbook example of the thing I am getting at in this blog. Tiger
Woods will die one day, as we all do, and on that day, he will be
remembered as the first really prominent black golfer, possibly the
greatest golfer ever period, and also as a guy with a sex addiction. The thing
he was most famous for and the worst thing he did that we know about.
While
I certainly will remember those things, I have two different memories
of Tiger Woods, both that popped back into my head as I wrote this blog.
The first is of a Tiger Woods, still fairly young, but definitely at
the top of his game, playing Glen Abbey, which is where they held the
Canadian Open tournament for many years in Oakville. I had been a few
times before I saw him that year, as I grew up a big golf fan and
player. But, this time, we were going to see Tiger Woods. My wife wanted
to see Tiger Woods. When we got to the hole he was playing, we actually
got a very close up green side position. He finished the hole and moved
right towards us. Like Arnold Palmer, Tiger Woods had a set of fans
that followed him from hole to hole, like he was the leader of a country
or a Royal Prince or Princess. It was tough to get near him with that
mass of people around. As he passed us, my wife was in some sort of
trance. "Oh my god, its Tiger Woods, he's so good looking." She started
to cry. I still tease her about that every time he is mentioned for some
reason. At that point, he had a god-like image.
A few
years later, it was the day my mother got even more sick. The brain
cancer had finally been diagnosed, and some of us were waiting in a
small waiting room with a TV. As I sat there, it was the day Tiger Woods
image began to shatter in front of the world. The day he drove his car
into a tree, and some of the details of his not so picture perfect life
were starting to come out. I connect that moment with my mothers
illness. For me, when I think of Tiger Woods, I already think of his
insane fame and his sharp fall because of his demons.
Also
yesterday, it came out that Diane Keaton is supporting Woody Allen, who
at this stage is pretty hard to support. The fall from comic genius
grace to whatever you think of Woody Allen now has been an ugly one.
Keaton is a long time friend, former lover and frequent star with Allen in some of
his biggest movies, including the one I will post a clip from shortly,
which is my favorite of his.
Allen
cheated on his wife Mia Farrow, and that doesn't distinguish him
from millions of men and women who have done that in their life. But he did
it with her 19 year old daughter in their own house right under her nose.
That certainly separates him from the pack. He admits to all of that and
never denied it. But, while that tarnished him in many eyes, that is
not the nail that sealed his fame coffin for good. Farrow has also
accused him of molesting their then 7 year old daughter Dylan at the
time they were breaking up. There is debate as to whether that actually
happened, and Dylan claims it did, while the vast majority say Farrow
coached and brainwashed her into thinking it did. Nobody knows for sure,
or probably ever will know the truth. But the truth doesn't matter in
the context of his legacy. Allen talks about all that back in 1992 on 60
Minutes, and near the end, how he is now thought of. That is part of
the idea that led me to write this blog.
Woody Allen is an old and frail man at this stage in 2018. He will surely die in the next few years.
When
that day comes, he will be remembered as a comic genius who created
many great films, and also as the man who cheated on his wife with her
daughter and might have been a child molester.
I
will remember him as a comic genius and the guy who taught me in a
roundabout way how to be funny without making obvious loud jokes like
Rodney Dangerfield and Henny Youngman do, although I loved both of those
guys in their own way also. This scene, the undertone of how it is
written and played, is what I am getting at. You have to watch it to see how the punchline was setup. It is the comic genius that is Woody Allen.
What are you doing Saturday night?
Committing suicide.
What about Friday night?
That is how I will remember Woody Allen. And of course, I wont forget the other bad things he did.
When
you die, you will be remembered for the things that made you famous,
and the worst thing or things you ever did. That will be your
legacy...unless you did something that connected on some other level
with specific people. In those cases, they remember you for that.
How
will I be remembered? I don't know. I'm not famous, and most of the bad
things I've done in my life weren't bad enough that others remember
them. I'm more likely to be remembered as the Jay Switzer type, but who
knows? I'm sure Woody Allen and Tiger Woods didn't think they would be
remembered more for the bad things they did when they were at the height
of their fame. I would hope those that remember me have some personal
memory that sticks with them, something I did well, or did for them, or
an interaction we had together.
For
Mark Salling, I'm sure there are many people that have those memories
of him and possibly with him. To others, he will just be that guy on
Glee, or a sick pedophile who liked child porn. The remembrances belong
to those who remember them. They own those.
No comments:
Post a Comment