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| Lolo Jones, on The Tonight Show |
The following is an actual fake conversation between the fictional character known as Forrest Gump and the potentially fictional PR image known as Lolo Jones. Lolo Jones is a female, 30 year old Olympic hurdler who has never won a medal, and claims to be a virgin even though she is incredibly hot and sexy. She is also a twitter sensation.
FG: Hello, my name is Forrest, Forrest Gump, what's yours?
LJ: I am Lolo Jones.
FG: That is a nice name, Lolo
LJ: Thank you Forrest. Your name sounds stupid.
FG: Stupid is as stupid does. Sally Field always said that, when she wasn't crying at the Academy Awards.
LJ: Who is Sally Field, is she some kind of track and field star?
FG: No, she was my fake mother in a movie I was in. You may not believe this, but I can run really fast. The writers made me that way in the movie so it would be more interesting.
LJ: Me too. I run very fast, and jump over hurdles.
FG: Are you fast enough to win a medal at the Olympics
LJ: No, I am just good enough to never be noticed.
FG: I also tried out for the Olympics. I play ping pong. But those Chinese boys were too good.
LJ: Did you win any medals at the Olympics?
FG: No, I'm just the local idiot, I never thought it would take me anywhere.
LJ: Oh, being an idiot can take you very far in America, trust me.
FG: I am not a smart man, but I know what bullshit is.
LJ: You're the same as everybody else, I am a virgin too. In my case, I just can't get laid.
FG: Will you be my friend, my special friend Lolo Jones?
LJ: Have you ever been with a girl Forrest?
FG :I sat next to them in home economics class all the time.
LJ: I make a great apple pie. We can be great friends. But I don't kiss boys, it is bad for my PR image. I kissed a girl once, and I liked that. But that is very bad for my PR image.
FG: We can be like peas and carrots.
FG: I got to meet the President of The United States. How about you?
LJ: No, I didn't actually win anything. Being a twitter star doesn't get you to meet the president.
FG: What is twitter?
LJ: It is a social network site where people who aren't famous try to create buzz around them selves so they can become famous.
FG: That is crazy, are you crazy or something?
LJ: I am not crazy. Please don't call me crazy, that is very upsetting to me.
FG: Crazy is as crazy does.
LJ: I don't think I like you anymore Forrest Gump.
FG: Maybe you should tweet that to your fake friends that you will never ever meet.
LJ: For some reason, what I was doing seemed to make sense to some people.
FG: That was my line in the movie.
LJ: I am Lolo Jones.
FG: That is a nice name, Lolo
LJ: Thank you Forrest. Your name sounds stupid.
FG: Stupid is as stupid does. Sally Field always said that, when she wasn't crying at the Academy Awards.
LJ: Who is Sally Field, is she some kind of track and field star?
FG: No, she was my fake mother in a movie I was in. You may not believe this, but I can run really fast. The writers made me that way in the movie so it would be more interesting.
LJ: Me too. I run very fast, and jump over hurdles.
FG: Are you fast enough to win a medal at the Olympics
LJ: No, I am just good enough to never be noticed.
FG: I also tried out for the Olympics. I play ping pong. But those Chinese boys were too good.
LJ: Did you win any medals at the Olympics?
FG: No, I'm just the local idiot, I never thought it would take me anywhere.
LJ: Oh, being an idiot can take you very far in America, trust me.
FG: I am not a smart man, but I know what bullshit is.
LJ: You're the same as everybody else, I am a virgin too. In my case, I just can't get laid.
FG: Will you be my friend, my special friend Lolo Jones?
LJ: Have you ever been with a girl Forrest?
FG :I sat next to them in home economics class all the time.
LJ: I make a great apple pie. We can be great friends. But I don't kiss boys, it is bad for my PR image. I kissed a girl once, and I liked that. But that is very bad for my PR image.
FG: We can be like peas and carrots.
FG: I got to meet the President of The United States. How about you?
LJ: No, I didn't actually win anything. Being a twitter star doesn't get you to meet the president.
FG: What is twitter?
LJ: It is a social network site where people who aren't famous try to create buzz around them selves so they can become famous.
FG: That is crazy, are you crazy or something?
LJ: I am not crazy. Please don't call me crazy, that is very upsetting to me.
FG: Crazy is as crazy does.
LJ: I don't think I like you anymore Forrest Gump.
FG: Maybe you should tweet that to your fake friends that you will never ever meet.
LJ: For some reason, what I was doing seemed to make sense to some people.
FG: That was my line in the movie.
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